IF ONLY
This are two of the most dangerous words in the english language. They are also two words that are common in my vocabulary. I had gotten to the point where they were very infrequent visitors to my thoughts, but lately they have crept back in again. I found myself thinking, "If only B would do what he tells me he is going to, I could keep up better." "If only I had some extra money to buy some new furniture, my home would feel more peaceful." "If only I had something to watch on tv, I would be motivated to fold laundry."
Why are these statements so dangerous? What is wrong with thinking of things that you wish would happen? If only, robs me of the peace and joy I could have right in this moment, because it takes the responsibility for my happiness away from me and puts it on something or someone outside of me. Happiness is not to be found from things or people. There is only one source for happiness, God. I need to surrender my fears, shame, lack of motivation, anxiety, and control to Heavenly Father. I need to put my trust in Him. He knows what I need. He knows that I am imperfect and flawed, yet He still loves me.
I am loved, and the only way to fight through life and find happiness is by surrendering to God's love.