If you are just learning to trust again, this may seem unfathomable to you. It certainly felt unfathomable to me for a while. I was introduced to a massage therapist we will call C. Well, I actually won a massage from her about fourish years ago. I was terrified the first time I went. It was scary to get naked on a table and let anyone touch me. I wanted to have a healing person touch me, but I was scared. C. was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G at putting me at ease. It took me a long time to be able to completely relax and let go though. She was patient with me and her character and energy are innately soothing, so I gradually started to trust that she could help me relax by using therapeutic touch. I started to trust someone to touch me for my benefit.
She has been using a modality called Myofascial Release Therapy on me for over a year now. It's a gentle touch that stretches and lengthens the fibers that cover all of our muscles and bind them together in a continuous sheet. Our entire body is covered in fascia, and by releasing the fascia the muscles relax. It is far more therapeutic for me than an actual massage. For more information about Myofascial Release Therapy click here.
I'll admit to being a skeptic at first, how could such a gentle touch relax my muscles which are often in knots. I will very willingly admit, I was wrong. This gentle touch has done more to help me relax and heal both physically and emotionally than any other form of touch has.
It wasn't until my treatment a month ago though, that I realized what an amazing gift C. had given me. I had learned to trust touch again. I had learned to allow another to touch me when I am most vulnerable in a safe and healing manner. It was seriously one of those lightning bolt moments. I realized as I was getting dressed that I trust C. completely, and in turn have learned to trust other touch. I implicitly trust that she has my healing as her focus when she is working on me. I have learned that touch CAN be healing. My body and my heart realized this a long time before my mind did. I thought back and realized that I let my guard down with her a long time ago. I trust her to intuitively know what my body needs and provide it (and she never fails to do so).
To lay there naked, in that vulnerable state, and know that I'm being protected (she keeps me modest and comfortable), and be able to completely relax, is remarkable. It is literally the only time all month that my brain "turns off" and finds peace. It is someplace I can be physically and emotionally vulnerable that I never feel judged, and I know I will never be taken advantage of. In fact, C. has gone above and beyond in making sure I get treated and that I am healing.
I know that Heavenly Father has given me the gift that is C., so that I can learn to trust that touch is safe again. I know that she is an angel here on earth. My respect and admiration of her is deep. She has truly been a gift in my life that I feel I can never repay, but that because of who she is I will never feel I need to. Thank you C., for teaching me to trust that touch can be healing and safe again.
Sincerely,
T.
