My Emotional First Aid Kit

When I was preparing for disclosure and for dealing with Betrayal Trauma in general, my therapist encouraged me to make an Emotional First Aid Kit. It was my strength and will continue to serve me as I move through recovery and life. I wanted to share with you some of the items for this kit that I found the most helpful.

The very first thing is to have good support. I have found an amazing group of women on FaceBook that have lifted me up the last few months. The Togetherness Community on FB is a secret group and that means nobody but those in the group can see that you are a part of it or anything you comment or post in it. If anyone reading this isn't part of that group and would like to be please email me at awifeprogressing(at)gmail(dot)com for details and/or an invitation. These amazing ladies are the sisters I have needed during this trial.

Here are some the actual physical items I included and why I decided to include them:

-Pictures - I have pictures of my grandparents (my grandma was my absolute safe person and I really miss her during times like this), a picture of my family when I was little (to remind me how much my family loves me), my book club (these have been my peeps for fifteen years and always have my back even though we are separated physically) and my family now (to remind me what I'm fighting for).

-Modeling clay - to have something to use to keep my hands busy (although I would recommend not buying colored clay as I looked like a Smurf by the time disclosure was over). It was so very therapeutic to be able to work it over and mold it.

-My ratty falling apart blanket that my grandma made me - again she was my safe person and the blanket wraps me in her love. I rarely allow myself to use it as it is in bad shape, but I felt I needed it this time.

-My stuffed black cat, Shadow (yes he has a name) - my sister gave him to me when I had surgery about seven years ago and when I need her and she can't be with me, my cat helps me feel her love.

-My worry stones (they even have names, I'll spare you those embarrassing details, but my kiddos helped me name them) - they serve a dual purpose: a - they give me something else I can keep in my hands to be able to have something to keep them busy and b - they remind me that something beautiful can come out of a trial because the four shiny ones started out rough and marked and came out of the tumbler shiny and smooth and the other one is a rock from the beach that has been worn smooth over time by water and sand.

-My Togetherness Project necklace - I wear this everyday as a reminder of the sister warriors that are supporting me all the time. It was a great reminder to me the last couple of days because these amazing sisters have texted me to make sure I am doing ok and provide encouragement and love. I hope they know how much it has meant to me.

-My therapist's cell phone number - because she's awesome like that and I did text her a couple times. She has been amazingly encouraging.

-My journal and a pen - because it helps to write things down and get my thoughts out so they don't go around and around in my head

-Tissues - that ones pretty self explanatory - to mop up the tears.

-My Dammit Doll - just see the picture below and it will be self explanatory.

-My scriptures and my prayers - because without the love and support of my Father in Heaven I would not be able to survive this trial.

I had a lot of other things in my industrial sized first aid kit for this weekend, but I keep my worry stones with me and wear my necklace every day to remind me of all the love and support I have. I would encourage anyone that hasn't made at least a simple Emotional First Aid kit to do so soon. Even if your trials are not the same as mine, everyone has trials and can benefit from items to help them get through.

Aided in my trials,

T.