I love that I get to share our story with others. I know that may sound odd, but I do. Why you ask? (You did ask didn't you?) Because I was so very alone for so incredibly long in this battle and I don't EVER want anyone else to feel alone. I don't ever want anyone else to suffer silently when there is a whole community of us out there ready to support you, love you and be there for you. We feel your pain. We have cried your tears. We want to be here to hold you up and dry your tears. We want to help shoulder your burden.
Part of the reason I feel surrounded I think, is because I notice. I notice the blog posts on pornography addiction. I notice those reaching out for help. I notice that Satan is trying to infiltrate our families from every angle.
I read a post tonight that I wish someone would have written twenty years ago. I don't think it would've changed my mind about marrying "B" but it would have enabled me to go in to our marriage without so much rosy tint to my glasses. It's about having that difficult conversation with any potential husband. Read it, share it, practice it (I have linked to it above if you click the word "post"). It may save you heartache and pain and may allow you to seek help with and for the man you love.
Please reach out if you need someone to listen. If you need a safe place to share. I live in a glass house, so I won't judge you, I'm haven't collected any rocks. You can email either of us at nothingunsaid@outlook<dot>com. You are not alone.
I read a post tonight that I wish someone would have written twenty years ago. I don't think it would've changed my mind about marrying "B" but it would have enabled me to go in to our marriage without so much rosy tint to my glasses. It's about having that difficult conversation with any potential husband. Read it, share it, practice it (I have linked to it above if you click the word "post"). It may save you heartache and pain and may allow you to seek help with and for the man you love.
Please reach out if you need someone to listen. If you need a safe place to share. I live in a glass house, so I won't judge you, I'm haven't collected any rocks. You can email either of us at nothingunsaid@outlook<dot>com. You are not alone.
Reaching out for you,
T.
There should be a class people take before they date. Sexual Addiction is not the only thing to be mindful when dating, I would add this to the list: narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial personality disorder, and borderline personality disorder. My story: my ex is very good at convincing people that she’s a victim, and that I’m a horrible person. I noticed a pattern of behavior like how she acted sweet she wanted something and a selfish temper came out when I didn’t do what she wanted. After some research I found that she acted all the traits of someone with covert-narcissistic personality disorder. Which means she doesn’t have an internal moral compass, she only wants to pursue her vain and selfish dreams and doesn't care if she misuses people to accomplish them. She doesn't care if she is mean and nasty privately as long people will validate her public face. Also her personality is inconsistent, it changes depending on who she is with. Narcissists don’t understand unconditional love, she fears she will lose control if she loves without getting something in return. It’s sad to know very few narcissists seek help or even recognize they have a problem. Though you can identify a covert-narcissist when they get excited or upset and you start hearing “I” and “me” frequently. Also you don’t ever hear them talk about self reflection, they value what can be seen, not what is on inside of themselves.
ReplyDeleteThank you Tom.
ReplyDelete